“One reason people struggle to gain influence in their personal and professional lives is that they simply don’t ask for what they want” – Brendon Burchard
I looked around the room, noticing how everyone is staring at their screens with such concentration that could shatter the monitor’s glass. A sense of uneasiness rose from inside me, that churning discomfort would make one continue on their path and leave things as it is. But, the project requires more perspective and more hands in order to get further traction. And then, I asked.
“Guys, I need help on this. Anyone up for it?”
Your Unwillingness to Ask, Doesn’t Reflect Others’ Unwillingness to Help
If you are like me, you would probably have gone through the whole self-talk process of why you shouldn’t ask for help, and instead push yourself through, eventually, maybe, making it work out.
In fact, this isn’t the first time, and I can recall numerous occasions in the past when I have self-sabotaged myself because of my unwillingness to ask for help. I have placed judgement upon myself that I don’t deserve help from others.
But the truth is that, people would love to help. Of course, we have to make it as easy as possible for them to do that too.
Perhaps, you and I have the mindset of giving first, before asking for help. And it is always more powerful to be giving. [Read: The Season of Giving – Should This be Seasonal?]
The Ability to Ask = Capability to be More Successful
How to ask? That’s a question I frequently ask (ok, that sounds irritating…).
There’s no hard and fast rule. The only way, as you already know, is to ask.
The worst that could happen, would simply just be a “no”. And it’s time to move on. If you are like me, often afraid of how people will think of you, the truth is you are very wrong. They often forget about you the very next moment.
Sometimes you might think, “why can’t they do it themselves? That seems simple enough.”
Well, it may very well be. But this will also be an opportunity for you to be giving and learning.
So the next time there’s an opportunity for you to practise asking, do it. Ask.
And give as soon you have someone asking you the same.